ATTENTION: The US Government is now looking for potential candidates for a new program designed to greatly increase the physical capabilities of a normal human being. Potential employees must be sickly, physically infirm, and possess an unfettered devotion to the ideas of patriotism. If you are interested, please send your application to General Chester Phillips at Operation: REBIRTH, 1234 Freedom Ave Sentinelville, 98765. All prospective employees will be a given a 3.5 inch high by 2.5 inch wide Captain America Jack Kirby White Magnet. It is great for protecting freedom, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.